Honest! I didn't do it...I don't even like doughnuts!

Did you ever buy a sack of doughnuts for the family, but they declined to eat but one little doughnut apiece , leaving ten fragrant pastries in the white bag...just sitting there...and you have an assortment of teas to brew, and well, maybe you make tea or coffee several times a day, and every time you say..."these doughnuts are small...ONE MORE WON'T HURT!", and so by the bewitching hour, the last doughnut is gone; wife ate one, visiting daughter ate half of one, and you, you unrelenting raider of the doughnut sack, yes, you, of the repetitively chanted eminent domain mantra, "WHO'S GONNA KNOW OR CARE ANYWAY!"..., mentally screaming 'carpe diem' , and then it turns to 'carpe doughnut!', as the bag lies there, violated, ripped, crumbs in the bottom, the contents ravished, the day done.

And you go to your chamber and write in your diary, "...I ate a piece of dry toast and went to bed."